I have meditated to discover my totem animal and discovered a connection with a Moose which at first seemed really strange but when I researched it, I discovered Moose are very nurturing and compassionate animals and their antlers represent psychic ability. Although I have never had much of a connection with my own totem animals, I easily see other people’s while doing Reiki. This usually gives me more information on what they are going through and what life lessons they have.

Anyway, this is just a little bit of fun and not to be taken too seriosuly, but I found this fun quiz to see what your totem animal is. Here are my results:

For 47,37 % you are: You are…A WOLF! Your utmost priority is leadership and kindness. You make friends easily and steadily, learn quickly, and care about others, hurting as much as they do when they’re having a hard time.

You could also get this result:
For 47,37 % you are: You are…A BEAR! You’re laid back, rather easygoing, and compassionate. You are rather unorganized, like to eat, and may be overweight. You cry over trivial matters, often, but are also there when a friend needs a laugh.

Or even this one:
For 5,26 % you are: You are…AN EAGLE! You’re serious, concentrated, calculating, and judging. You are a natural born leader, and can be compassionate towards close friends. You may come off rather bossy to some.

Or even this one:
For 10,53 % you are: You are…A DEER! You’re artistic, creative, very compassionate, gentle, and kind. You like to delve into very complicated artistic activities such as drawing, sketching, or playing music. You’re always there when a friend needs you.

A really great site on animal symbolism, if you find a recurrance of a certain animal in your life or have a meaningful dream about an animal, is this one.

On that site, I found the following info on wolf totems:

‘To understand totem wolf symbols, one must first understand the heart of the Wolf. This takes time because the Wolf has had to endure many false stereotypes, misconceptions and misunderstandings.

Some common traits that accompany totem wolf symbols:

• Intelligence
• Cunning
• Communication
• Friendliness
• Loyalty
• Generosity
• Compassionate

Not at all the picture of ferocity or terror, the Wolf is a creature with a high sense of loyalty and strength. Another misconception is that of the “lone wolf.” To the contrary, the Wolf is actually a social creature, friendly, and gregarious with its counterparts.

The Wolf is an incredible communicator. By using touch, body movements, eye contact as well as many complex vocal expressions – the wolf makes his point understood. Those with totem wolf symbols are of the same inclination – they are expressive both vocally and physically. Those who have the wolf as their totem animal are naturally eloquent in speech, and also have knack for creative writing.

Totem wolf symbols belong to those who truly understand the depth of passion that belong to this noble creature. The Wolf is a representative of deep faith, and profound understanding.

Further, the Wolf possess a high intellect, and have been observed using strategies about hunting, habitat and migration.

In history, the totem Wolf symbol appears with the founders of Rome, Romulus and Remus. Legend has it that the two founding brothers were raised and suckled by a she-wolf.

In Norse mythology, the Wolf is a symbol for victory when ridden by Odin and the Valkyries upon the battlefield.

As a Celtic symbol, the Wolf was a source of lunar power. Celtic lore states that the Wolf would hunt down the sun and devour it at each dusk so as to allow the power of the moon to come forth.

In Asia, the wolf guards the doors that allow entrance to heavenly, celestial realms. The Wolf is also said to be among the ancestry of Genghis Khan.

When this gracious creature appears to us, and serves as a totem in our lives, the Wolf beckons us to ask these questions:

• Are you thinking about a different form of education?
• Are you being a true friend, and are your friends being true to you?
• Are you communicating yourself clearly to others?
• Are you being loyal to yourself?
• Are you incorporating strategies and planning to achieve your goals?
• Are you spending enough quality time with yourself, friends and family?’

For still more info on totem animals, look here.

I love my country and more specifically my city, Cape Town, the city were I was born and have spent most of my life. I love our beautiful Table Mountain, the vineyards and countryside, the sea and beautiful views. I love the South African hospitality, local products and art, good food and sense of humour. I certainly hope our visitors will enjoy all of these things when they come for the World Cup in less than 2 weeks time. They say Africa gets under your skin and you can’t wash her off (the movie Blood Diamond was illustrates this perfectly) and I think it is true. If you were born on this beautiful yet savage continent a part of your heart will always belong here. And yet, despite all of this I have never really had a feeling of fitting here. Strange I know and I can’t pin point it. I grew up always feeling like my destiny was elsewhere and that one-day I would leave. As a white South African in turbulent times I think this feeling has grown. South Africa is my home and yet it often doesn’t feel like home. What makes it home for me, is really my family. When I was 21 I did leave my home country and lived in London for just over 4 years. I love London and made a good life for myself there, but it too never really felt like home. Throughout my life I have had an interest and fascination for France, the French Language, art and culture and when I first visited the country, it felt familiar and welcoming to me. I would have loved to have lived in the beautiful city of Strasbourg for a year or so and of course Lyon and Paris are magical cities, to say nothing of what I have seen of the French countryside.  I love the place, but on all my visits, it has also never felt like home.  At this point one could get all philosophical and reflect on such sayings as ‘home is where the heart’ is and you ‘take your home with you’, which of course are all true but besides the point of this, now rather rambling, blog post!

The point of this post is actually to mention some of my dreams. I have been getting the message recently to pay attention to my dreams. This past week I have dreamt of India twice. On the first occasion I dreamt I visited India with my family. The images, sounds and smells of the country were so vivid. The swirling colours of saris, the pungent mixed smell of spices, human flesh and incense; the noise of bells, whistles, music and car horns. That is one of the most significant things about visiting India – it is a sensory overload. Every inch of your body feels awake. In my next dream, I actually awoke, went to the toilet and then when I returned to bed, simply slipped straight back into the same dream and continued from there.  It too was vivid and I should have written all the little details down as now they are blurry in my mind. What I do remember was buying herbs and vegetables from some street venders. I was in Mumbai and close to the sea and the Gate of India. I was amidst the hustle and bustle of the busy streets, yet close enough to smell the salt in the air blown from the sea. I was aware how each vendor was hoping I would choose their produce and how by doing so, I would feed their family. In the dream, everything felt familiar, I was speaking Hindi and on a first-name basis with the people. I remember their bright smiles and friendly faces. My dream made me remember the feel of India and just how she, like her sister Africa, gets under your skin. She too is a beautiful yet savage continent, a place on this Earth you either love or hate. I place that challenges you in every way. My dream made me remember how it felt to be there and what it felt like to be home.
I am awake now, but I can still hear her calling me…

Recently, well for the past 2 years actually, I have not been in a very spiritual place. Perhaps one could call it, “The dark night of the soul”, but I think that would be overly dramatic. I have simply been preoccupied. In these two years I have been busy with an honours degree in psychology and with the all-encompassing pregnancy, birth and care of my two beautiful baby girls. So, my focus has been elsewhere and that has been fine and how it should be, but in the process of turning away from my spirituality, I turned away from myself, my fulfillment and connection to spirit. This is important, because apart from true happiness, being disconnected from spirit and the flow of life, has led I believe to a lot of negative energy and a cycle of (for lack of a better phrase) bad luck. I have felt bewildered for a while over this stuck energy and lack of positive changes in my life and those close to me. Recently I had a dream. In that dream, I entered a shop in a centre. It was a lovely shop, selling interesting things, but the name of the shop was “Powerless”. When I awoke and analysed my dreams, as I do, I marveled at how amazing our subconscious mind is. The name of the shop, in bright letters, accurately described the predominant feeling I have been experiencing in my life. I got the message. Don’t get me wrong, I have not been depressed, or suffering in all areas of my life. In fact, in general I manage pretty well and life is good. I am a strong person and many areas of my life (especially that regarding my family), are thriving and fulfilling, for which I feel truly blessed. It is just that in certain areas there is a need for a shift in energy, more positive events and progress. I know it is a recession and the general global mood is pretty negative and one of ‘lack’ and all that, but still that does not cut it! For a while now I have identified that energy is blocked, I just have done nothing to fix it. For a while, I think I even forgot that I had the power and ability to create the life I want and became like a leaf just floating with the river, even if that river wasn’t particularly going anywhere. Things started to change just before my birthday. I have been trying to figure out how to be of use to the world once again, to make money, have a sense of freedom and independence, all while not having to leave my children in the care of anyone else or have them suffer in any way. This is tricky. I came up with an idea and have slowly been working on it with my wonderfully talented husband (more about this later). Then recently, while doing some research on the internet, I came across a gratitude journal and a woman who spoke about the secret to life being “To Give and to Give thanks”. This resonated with me. I realised how at one point my life was all about giving (although I had to learn lessons there too – like establishing boundaries, not being burnt out etc) and now it was not. Of course, I give all day to my children, but in terms of working with others, things had come to a halt. Even the charity work /karma yoga I used to do, had stopped. Next, there was the part about giving thanks. Strangely enough, I had just created the rhymesandreasons blog and typed my 5 reasons to be grateful on it(see above), so this resonated with me. I understood I needed to practice gratitude daily and stop focusing on what was wrong or needed improving in my life. The secret is to focus on what is right. My brain had been processing this for about a week, until I think there was a shift and I truly got it. Every day now I am giving thanks and have just started a gratitude journal. Those wonderful synchronistic events that were once an everyday occurrence in my life, have now returned and I have encountered numerous references to gratitude journals and the importance of giving thanks (even in the You magazine that I acquired by accident). I then watched a DVD on positive thinking and The Law of Attraction, based on the teachings behind The Secret and even more synchronistic occurrences have resulted these past few days!
I now feel a shift and it fills me with energy, enthusiasm and strength. Nothing major has changed so far, except, and most importantly, my attitude. You see, it all comes down to attitude and while I apply that positive approach to many areas of my life, I have now vowed to apply it to all.
So, watch this space. Magic is happening.